He never worries

Tomorrow is an interesting day in my life, its a day of celebration and a day of sadness all at the same time.  You see tomorrow is my birthday and an anniversary of a very troubling day in my life, plus this year its kinda of a day to celebrate a new chapter in my life.

Tomorrow could really go either way for me because for the past two years its been a really tough day for me, its been a day of sadness and mourning and not of celebration.  Even now as I reflect on tomorrow and its significance, I have mixed emotions.  Every year my birthday reminds me that things can be sailing along smoothly and perfectly and the next day everything can change, so because things have been going so smoothly so far I can't help but be concerned that tomorrow everything will change.

You'll think its funny when I tell you that my life verse is Philippians 4:6-7 that says:

⁶ Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

The Message says it this way:

^6-7Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.

Its my reminder when I start to feel this way that I can turn my attention to my Creator and ask for peace and wholeness, but as a flawed human I often forget that the "peace that transcends all understanding" is available to me, I just have to ask.

I can't help but worry about things, but when I turn my worry into prayers He is always faithful.  "Ask and ye shall receive."  That peace is always available for you.  Its an amazing feeling when you realize that you are in His hands and that He is in control.  When you redirect your attention heavenward instead of on your problems, your entire outlook changes.  The worry melts away as the peace takes hold.

When you start to fret about tomorrow turn your attention towards your Creator.  Let Him know your concerns and worries.  Ask that He remind you that He is in control and He is holding and keeping you from harm.  Relax in the peace that is always available. 

Him the living water

¹³ Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, ¹⁴ but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” John 4:13-14

That verse is an excerpt from John 4:1-26 where the Son talks with a Samaritan woman at the well of Jacob.  Most of us have heard this story and can quote the above scripture, but the part that always gets me is:

¹⁵ The woman said to him, “Sir, give me this water so that I won’t get thirsty and have to keep coming here to draw water.” ¹⁶ He told her, “Go, call your husband and come back.” ¹⁷ “I have no husband,” she replied.   Jesus said to her, “You are right when you say you have no husband. ¹⁸ The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.”

To begin with the Jews didn't like the Samaritans.  We all know the Story of the Good Samaritan, where the Son uses the hated Samaritans to prove that all even hated people have good hearts, but in the story of the Woman at the Well the Son asked a Samaritan woman to get him some water.  Knowing of their status the Samaritan woman even says:

⁹ You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?”

The Son replies:

¹⁰ Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.”

and a few verses later we are back to where the Son asks the women to go and bring back her husband.

Women in the Son's day couldn't divorce, they were divorced and when their husbands left them they had nothing, they were destitute.  This poor woman was desperate to find someone to support her, so she probably married again very quickly.  Again and again and again and again, until that moment in time when she was now living with a man that she wasn't even married to but that didn't matter to the Son.  He offered her what He offers everyone else, living water.

I'm sure we have all felt like the Samaritan Woman at least one time in our life.  So desperate for something that we jump in to quickly and end up being hurt all over again.  We look to satisfy our worldly desires instead of the desires of our souls.  We go from place to place looking to fill a need when we really need to only up heavenward., but just like the Samaritan women we often feel unworthy.

She came to the well in the middle of the day to avoid the stares and the mumblings, so when a Jewish man starts to talk to her she is shocked on several levels. This poor woman had been disrespected by men so many times, I imagine when the Son spoke to her with dignity her eyes lit up. She's intrigued by His gentle nature.  She's sucked in by His kind words.  She's fascinated by His unconditional acceptance.  She all but begs for the living water He is offering her and in return He says:

²¹ “Woman,” Jesus replied, “believe me, a time is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. ²² You Samaritans worship what you do not know; we worship what we do know, for salvation is from the Jews. ²³ Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in the Spirit and in truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. ²⁴ God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in the Spirit and in truth.”  ²⁵ The woman said, “I know that Messiah” (called Christ) “is coming. When he comes, he will explain everything to us.” ²⁶ Then Jesus declared, “I, the one speaking to you—I am he.”

 The man she's been looking for all this time is seated in front of her.  The Man that can satisfy all her desires is within reach.  Her response is to go back to her people and tell them about Him.

²⁸ Then, leaving her water jar, the woman went back to the town and said to the people, ²⁹ “Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Messiah?” ³⁰ They came out of the town and made their way toward him.

A few verses later it says this:

³⁹ Many of the Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman’s testimony, “He told me everything I ever did.” ⁴⁰ So when the Samaritans came to him, they urged him to stay with them, and he stayed two days. ⁴¹ And because of his words many more became believers. ⁴² They said to the woman, “We no longer believe just because of what you said; now we have heard for ourselves, and we know that this man really is the Savior of the world.”

Your testimony is powerful, whether your a Samaritan or a Jew we all have a story that needs to be told.  Your testimony just might be what someone needs to hear to release their faith.

He loves all people

"People are interesting." Abigail Minderman

I meet a lot of interesting people at the church I attend.  People of all kinds are attracted to my church because of many reasons but especially because, "There are people that look like me here." My new friend Lauren, whom I met over the weekend at church, said that to me when I asked her what drew her to The Life Church.  I thought that was an interesting answer and as she told me more about her interesting life I began to understand what she ment.

Churches are interesting in general.  Its not necessarily their belief system or how they worship but its the people that they attract.  There's an interesting billboard on Germantown Parkway that reads something like, "Sunday shouldn't be the most segregated day of the week." We've come such a long way since segregation, yet we haven't come very far at all.

You see my friend Lauren is part of a bi-racial couple.  She was telling me about the church that her mother attends and the church that his parents attend and neither of them for one reason or another felt comfortable in the other family's church. Its unfortunate that people would ever feel uncomfortable in church but its especially terrible if they are uncomfortable because of the color of their skin.

I grew up in an upper middle class neighborhood, church and school, everyone looked like me.  I wasn't raised to dislike anyone but I really didn't have any access to anyone that didn't look like me until I was much older and even then I didn't understand what all the hype was about.  I had studied enough anatomy and physiology to know that we were the same on the inside and even now with the Human Genome Project we have discovered that 99% of all of us is exactly the same.

If 99% of each of us is the same, why do we focus on the 1% that's not?  Why are we making people feel uncomfortable about the color of their skin?

One of my favorite verses is Psalm 139:14, it says: "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well."  The Almighty Creator made each and everyone of us, perfectly in His image.  Church shouldn't be a place where people feel inferior or self-conscious because the color of their skin or that they've come from another side of town or they don't have a newer car.  Churches should be accepting of all people because the Son accepted all people. 

The Son was interested in interesting people. He loved people that didn't look or talk like him.  He welcomed the poor and disabled.  He fed hungry people and offered help to the broken and if we are to call ourselves His followers then we ought too as well.

I challenge you to step outside your comfort zone and engage someone who is different then you.  You might find out that they are as interesting as you are.

In Him we trust

I've written a lot about punctuation, if you need to read those posts click here. In His Glory I talked about how punctuation is often painful, but its often unexpected which makes the pain even more unbearable.  However punctuation, as painful as it is, is often necessary because without it our lives might not make sense.  He uses punctuation as a means to communicate with us that certain chapters of our lives are over or maybe even to let us know that its time for a change of scenery or pace.

If you read you know that I have experienced lots of punctuation over the last two years, some good and some bad but I've managed to keep my faith intact.  When I thought I couldn't handle anymore, His light shown through.  When I thought my walls were high enough and strong enough, He broke through.  When I thought I was lost, He showed me the way.  When I thought I was at the edge, He pulled me close.

I was reminded of my theme song yesterday and this verse came to mind:

Then in fellowship sweet 
we will sit at his feet, 
or we'll walk by his side in the way; 
what he says we will do, 
where he sends we will go; 
never fear, only trust and obey. 

When you walk out your faith in good times or in bad the punctuation in our lives starts to work to our advantage.  As painful as it is, it opens us up for our next steps and as I said in in this post, it can be used to show His glory in our lives.

As I've walked, I've learned a lot.  I've learned that periods don't necessarily mean death.  I've learned that new beginnings, even though they are scary can really be enjoyable.  I've learned that commas only mean, not now but definitely later.  I've also learned that faith replaces fear and anxiety.

I'll leave you with this verse from Ephesians 3:12-13 taken from the Message:

When we trust in Him, we're free to say whatever needs to be said, bold to go wherever we need to go. So don't let my present trouble on your behalf get you down. Be proud!

His love never fails

I am 9 days from finishing the Love Dare but I don't think I will finish it.  I started blogging through the book as a way to put my thoughts on paper, because you see I like to process my feelings and thoughts, out loud. A lot of times things don't make sense to me until I start processing though them. Whether I do it through writing or talking, as I process I start to learn about the lessons I am being taught in each situation.


As I have been writing over the past months I have discovered several things:

1. I've always known how difficult relationships can be but when people really believe that they can work they do.
2. I've noticed that dysfunctional relationships are the norm and that healthy relationships are hard to come by.
3. I've found that even though I talk a big game I know nothing about relationships.  If I did I might not have so much knowledge about them.
4. I've discovered that relationships are more then just 50/50, they're about giving your all, all the time.
5. I've learned that those that you must make each other a priority and not just an option.
6. I've realized that sometimes the best thing that you can do for your significant other is to just be present in the moment.
7. I've known that sometimes we must get outside our comfort zones to better relate to our partners, but now I see that it is a requirement.
8. I've figured out that the only way to a healthy relationship is to start with a healthy you.
9. I've wised up to the fact that just because you've witnessed dysfunction in the past, you are still worthy of functionality.
10. I've determined that your past has nothing to do with your future. 

His love unites

Day 30...Love brings unity

Today's Dare: Isolate one area of division in your marriage and look on today as a fresh opportunity to pray about it.  Ask the Lord to reveal anything in your own heart that is threatening oneness with your spouse.  Pray that He would do the same for them and if appropriate discuss this matter openly, seeking God for unity.

I've been stuck on this dare for 5 days now.  I've gone several different directions with my posts but I have erased all of them, none seem to really hit the heart of this dare.  Unity is so important in a relationship.  I know that we won't always agree on things but when there is division in a relationship, negativity begins to pop up and where there is negativity, a wedge starts to get driven between the two halves and when that wedge gets deep enough the two halves split and that's when things get messy.

None of us are perfect.  Grace and forgiveness need to be given to those we love.  Unconditional love that doesn't keep score, is what we need to provide for our mates.  Take a moment to ask for help in providing that kind of love for your spouse.  Look to the One that loves us unconditionally for guidance.

His love is motivating

Day 29...Love's Motivation

Today's Dare: Before you see your spouse again today, pray for them by name and for their needs whether it comes easy for you or not, say "I love you," then express love to them in some tangible way.  Go to God in prayer again, thanking Him for giving you the privilege of loving this one special person - unconditionally, the way He loves both of you.  

The motivation to love is different for everybody.  We all have this natural instinct to love and be loved, but to love unconditionally for life doesn't come that easy.  Some animals mate for life and long ago we as humans used to as well, but now that divorce is so easy and not as taboo as before and also now because our world is focused on instant gratification, its harder and harder to find couples that have mated for life.

Its much easier to look for someone else to satisfy our needs when things get tough or start to head in a direction that we were not expecting.   Its easy to believe that our lives would be better if we didn't have to deal with our spouse's nagging or complaining.  We can get sucked into that old saying, "The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence."  Its hard to see when you're in the middle of something tough that there is a light at the end of the tunnel and its not an oncoming train.

I wrote an entire series of posts about Jonah last year and I think the part that stuck with me the most is the moment that Jonah gets spit back onto the land after being in the whale for 3 days.  At that moment he had a choice.  He could have turned and run a second time or he could start walking towards Nineveh. You see Nineveh is still quite a ways off in the distance.  Jonah can't see Nineveh from where he is but he starts walking anyway. Jonah knows that He will guide his steps.  Relationships and especially marriage are like that, we often can't see our destination but when He is our guide we know that the way will be shown to us, so we keep walking.

Even when troubles come, we keep walking.  When the storms are raging, we keep walking.  When we can't imagine spending one more moment with our spouse, we keep walking hand in hand.  Step by step. Inch by inch.  Year by year.  Moment by moment, we keep walking because when He is in the middle He will show us the way.

He sacrificed for love

Day 28...Love makes sacrifices

Today's Dare: What is one of the greatest needs in your spouse's life right now?  Is there a need you could lift from their shoulders today by a daring act of sacrifice on your part?  Whether the need is big or small, purpose to do what you can meet the need. 

 When we first meet, we fall all over ourselves to make time for our girlfriend/boyfriend.  Its human nature to want to make them feel cared and loved.  We do that by showing that we are able to provide and take care of them and their needs.  As we make them a priority they feel loved and cherished. 

We decide what is top on our priority list.  We decided where we put our time.  We determine what is important in our life and what is not.  Life pulls us in many directions.  We choose to look or not to look for reasons to help our spouse.  We choose to make or not to make time for their needs. We choose to make them top or bottom on our priority list.

There is no doubt that you know what your spouse's needs are but if you are not sure look at where their priorities are and if you still need help, ask them.  A conversation about each of your needs goes a long way in healing the hurt that you have unintentionally done 

Relationships are about sacrifice, make yours intentional.